ache

always thought i would be strong enough
to be the friend
just the friend
but can't ignore the ache
the little motions and movements
reaching out to you
wishing to tell you the truth
just wondering if you even notice
all the little things i do
and would do
can feel you drifting away
slipping through my fingers like smoke
and i can't call out
and i can't hold onto you
want you to be happy
even though it bruises me inside
its Christmastime
moments of truth and honesty
and all that i should say to you
because don't we deserve some truth in our lives
yet i know another year will pass
another holiday season
mouth still unable to tell you the words
so i wait
as my heart aches a little bit more



*thank you LOVE ACTUALLY